Posts Tagged ‘Love’
Always Hurting The Ones You Love?
I believe everyone should have the experience of being in a serious argument with someone whom they love, such as parents, children, husband or wife, etc. It seems like the closer we are to someone, the easier we would get upset because of that person.
When we are in an argument with someone, we often lose our rational thinking temporarily and say things that might hurt the other person. When we calm down, we might discover that the things that we have said to our loved ones during the quarrel might be so rude that you won’t even say it to a stranger.
It is curious that we are very likely to bicker with our family members once we are angry or upset. No matter what the reason behind is, it is not good to be angry with someone you love.
Many people often find that they treat strangers in a better way than treating their families or friends. One reason for this is perhaps the closer we are to someone, the more we would open our hearts for that person. Thus, we tend to show more anger towards people that we actually care.
As we are open to them, we also become more sensitive to them. It is very easy to be angry with our family members when something stressful happens. This explains why we tend to hurt our families but not strangers.
We get into relationships because we think we would be happy staying with the other person. No one would want a relationship that causes pain. Unfortunately, when we are overwhelmed by fear or anger, we tend to act in ways that would hurt our relationships.
One danger of anger is that it can turn into violence when a sense of revenge emerges. To avoid such situation, a person has to be highly mature and be able to control his/her emotions well. Thus, whenever an argument arises, you should try to calm down and pay attention to your emotions and actions. We often make impulsive choices unconsciously and this can lead to great dangers.
We should always aim for achieving a higher level of mental awareness, so that we can maintain a harmonious and safe relationship with our families and others. We should try best to calm down ourselves when we are facing emotional storms or stressful situations.
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Tags: anger, Arguments, Beloved, Disagreements, family, Hurt, Love, Mental awareness, Relationships, spouse, violence
Seven Methods to Build Trust in a Relationship
Do you know these 7 concrete paths to build trust in a relationship? Frequently what really makes a relationship work are not the things we think of first. For instance, do you suspect you always need to spice things up? Wrong! Predictability is more vital than variety in a relationship. The following 7 techniques are warranted to grow your connection by bettering the level of trust in a relationship.
First, as I mentioned in the opening paragraph, you want to be predictable. This goes against the common idea you need to “stir things up” to keep the love alive. Sure, going to a new eaterie or giving a shock present can be nice, but most of all, we need things to be consistent and steady to make our relationships work. Consider that trust in a relationship is constructed on being reliable day in and day out.
Next, you need to make sure that your words always match the message. This indicates that your other half desires to hear the words which match your body language. If you are saying you are content but you are scowling, your partner doesn’t hear your words, he or she sees your face and the tone in your voice. Your parter should be able to trust what you are pronouncing. When the words match the message, you build trust in a relationship.
Third, you want to have a fundamental belief in your partner’s competency. If you don’t you won’t have the trust in a relationship you need. When lovingly communicated, the truth is never destructive. When you don’t believe that your better half is competent at some things (or indeed, anything), you violate the trust in a relationship.
Don’t keep secrets. Techniques destroy the trust in a relationship. Be truthful and open. Presume everything you know will at last come out. Methods need enormous energy on your side. That is energy that might be going into building the relationship.
Fifth, don’t be afraid to let your other half know what your requirements are. Don’ t make him or her guess what you want. Make them know. It is okay to be self-centered as long as you are not selfish. you are disinclined to claim your wishes, you will go over the top in the opposite direction and smother your partner.
Sixth, learn to decline. When your partner voices their needs, that’s thing. But you do not need to claim yes to everything. A partner cannot respect you if you never say no. Refusing to be subjugated to the other person’s will actually builds trust in a relationship.
Finally, always pursue expansion. When you plant a flower, you begin by digging in the dust. Digging in the dust of our relationships can often cause discomfort. But, through that pain, we prepare the soil for future expansion. Do not be terrified of chaos, crisis, or questions. These become the manure for growth and change. Embrace what’s tough.
When you choose to work on trust in a relationship, you are certain to encounter a little agony. But, as you’re employed thru this pain, you may not only become stronger as an individual, you will also strengthen your coupledom.
Tags: Dating, divorce, family, Health, Home, kids_and_teens, Love, men, Psychology, Relationships, self-help, society, weddings, women
Love Advice – 3 Keys For True Love
True love is what everybody wants in their relationship. We all have intimacy needs and we all want true love. We hope for it and work hard to find the right relationship so we can have it.
So we finally get into a relationship, things are great for a while, we feel some sense of true love, we are very hopeful. But then, true love seems to start slipping away. This person we love starts to lose their luster, we start to notice little things about them that bother us, or vice versa, they start to get bothered by us. In time we can start to argue and further on we can break up or get a divorce.
Finding true love usually ends up being easier than keeping true love. If it was easy to keep it, we’d all still be with our first high school crush. How then do you keep true love from slipping away? There are some key factors.
The first thing is to realize that there are phases to all relationships. The honeymoon “there’s only you” phase will not last. The next phase is the me/us period, where separation and getting on with your own goals starts to become important. But true love isn’t gone in this phase, it just changes its feel.
Another thing that is vital to understand with true love is that it is about giving as well as receiving. You have to give your time and loving attention to your mate regularly. And your mate has to give some loving attention to you. You cant keep true love if you are doing all the giving or all the receiving.
A third key to true love is to PLAY. Play is vital to a healthy, loving, intimate relationship. Play with your mate on a regular basis, in bed and out. Dont let the burdens and responsibilities of adulthood and job kill off the play in your relationship.
Do you have a regular date night? Do you have a few things you enjoy doing together? Playing together may be hard if youve gotten out of the habit, but with a little attention you can start to bring some back. And studies have shown the more play the less fighting and conflict. Play is good!
True love, then, requires some focus and attention. If you do not give up when things get tough, if you give some time and attention to play in your relationship, you can actually keep true love alive. That and keep learning more about it and you can keep it alive with your mate.
Tags: advice, conflict, education, family, intimacy, Love, marriage, relationship advice, relationship help, Relationships, society, true love
Get your better Half To Agree To Relationship Counseling
Relationship analysis is frequently a final resort for couples on the edge of the divorce. But some couples try counseling early on when the 1st issues rear their heads. Counseling is definitely something a couple should not be afraid to try, even if the issues are comparatively minor. Typically catching little issues early with analysis can prevent bigger issues down the line. Early analysis can even something stop a future divorce.
Today’s couples seem more raring to new things, which makes analysis a good option. Couples married years ago seem less likely to go for support or try new approaches, perhaps because it wasn’t something commonly done when they were younger. Quite often marriages of thirty or 40 years now end in divorce, which is a shame because they will never know if relationship analysis might have helped save the wedding.
If you feel like you need relationship support, be certain to as your other half to go to support with you in a non-judgmental way. If you ask him or her to go to counseling in such a way as it seems like you are accusing them of being the problem and needing counseling, you’re likely to encounter resistance to the idea. Try and make it obvious that you want the counseling for yourself if nothing else.
If you ask your better half to go to support as you have some issues you must work on, they are rather more likely to view the idea positively. Explain that you believe you want some aid to be ready to contribute more to the relationship, and to find out how to be a better partner or spouse. Don’t accuse the other person of need counseling. Even if you believe that they are the majority of the problem, don’t say so. Once you’re in relationship counseling, they will learn tips and techniques for being better in the relationship, just as you will.
Don’t be afraid to suggest relationship analysis, whether you’ve been in the relationship for 3 months, three years or 20 years. It’s not ever too late to try counseling to resolve problems. And it is not ever too late to try to keep small problems from becoming large ones. If the relationship is comparatively new, you could think that you’re admitting to problems and admitting that the relationship is rocky by making the recommendation analysis. But that isn’t true. But facing any obstacles now, you are making the relationship stronger in the long run.
If your partner believes that your idea of relationship analysis means the relationship isn’t perfect, and maybe even is condemned, quietly explain that that isn’t true. Just because you are prepared to admit that everything is perfect shows that you’re willing to make mandatory changes to keep the other person and yourself happy.
If your partner refuses, go on your own. While the counseling would work best if both of you go, you can go and work on things to enhance yourself. If your partner sees you going to relationship counseling, they’re more likely to give it a try.
Tags: Dating, divorce, family, Health, Home, kids_and_teens, Love, men, Psychology, Relationships, self-help, society, weddings, women
The Body Language Of Flirting, Part 6
In the last part of this article I outlined how and why facial expressions play such a pivotal role in flirting.
In this part, I’ll show you WHY people put out fake signals, and HOW we can use facial expressions to our advantage!
Why would be bother trying to look beneath the surface to figure out the person’s true intention? Well, at times a person feels they HAVE to hide their feelings.
Someone who is in a relationship, yet is flirting with another person, can put on a neutral face in order to seem harmless. Or an insecure person who doesn’t trust his feelings and doesn’t want to risk the odds and show his feelings. There are countless reasons to look below the surface.
Generally, the most commonly faked expression is a smile. In social situations, a smile might be faked to show that they are courteous, despite the fact that they do NOT want to speak with the person that is talking to them.
So how do you spot a fake smile? First, look at the eyes. Do wrinkles appear around them? If yes, then it’s almost always genuine.
Is the smile even on both sides? If no, it’s another sign of a manufactured smile. Also watch for poorly timed smiles – ones that are held too long, or pop up late.
It just takes some time to get a firm idea of this.
As well, in a situation where one might be flirting, it’s the same principal – look at the clue, but pay attention to who is sending it. A very outgoing person might smile at you, but that could be their normal manner. A shy person smiling at you is a far better signal. Pay attention the person doing it.
For your own facial expressions, this is very important too. Some people are a bit put off if you aren’t close to matching their levels of expression – if you are too “stone faced” with a person who is very expressive, it can be frustrating, and vice versa.
If you work on it, you can match the level of expression they display.
As well, learning to use your face informatively is the best thing you can do in this manner. Allow it to show expression, then match the level of expression that the other person is giving off. So pay attention to how you are using your face!
You can nod, as stated above. Raising an eyebrow is also good to show surprise.
In a nutshell, you need to react to what they are showing you. It shows you are paying attention, which is a great thing to do!
I’ll write about our sense of touch in the next article, and how it is important in flirting!
Tags: advice, approaching women, Dating, flirting advice, flirting with women, how to flirt with women, lifestyle, Love, men's health, Men's Interest, men's issues, Relationships, sex, Sexuality
A Man’s Secrets to Successful Online Dating
People have taken to online dating like ducks take to water because it works or, at least, it can work. Women are, more often, terrified of meeting a man that they have been chatting to online.
They have all heard the frightening things that can happen and, it is true that they have the right to be careful. That’s not only wise but very important. So what’s a nice guy supposed to do? You aren’t a pervert, a sexual predator, or a weirdo. You are just a nice guy looking for the right girl for you.
You have to|must| be patient before all else. you face-to-face. She will only think that you are desperate or a pervert. Be patient, patient, patient!.
Be completely honest about your physical appearance and your job. A good relationship has never been, and will never be, built on lies and deceit. Sooner or later, she will find out the truth anyway and then you are back to square one.
They say that a picture is worth a thousand words. So an idea would be to post a few pictures of yourself doing your daily activities and make them full body (clothed, not rude), not just of your head. After all. if you were dating a girl in the real world she wouldn’t just see your head, would she?
Once the discussion has been opened about meeting face-to-face for the first time, suggest that you meet in a very public place, during daylight hours and that she bring a friend with her.
When all is said and done, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. You have already told her the truth about yourself and she has already seen a few photos of you. Then only thing left to do is to is make her feel safe meeting you!
Tags: behavior, body language, Dating, divorce, Hobbies, language, Love, marriage, men, other, Psychology, Relationships, romance, women
How To Catch Cheating Spouse – Pros And Cons Of Hiring A Private Investigator
Perhaps, the greatest benefit of using the services of a private investigator is that you do not have to see the act being committed yourself. Yes, you will still likely get video footage and pictures of your spouse cheating, but that is much different than seeing the act with your own eyes.
In fact, you don’t even have to look at the documentation your private investigator provides you with. Well-known and reputable private investigators do not lie. Take the proof and pass it on to your divorce attorney.
While there are advantages of hiring a private investigator, there are also some disadvantages. One of the most obvious disadvantages is the fees involved.
When hiring a private investigator, it is important for you to use your best judgment. Spend as little money as possible, but make sure that you hire an individual who is trustworthy and who has a good reputation. In this situation, quality is more than worth the extra cost.
Beside keeping track of the cost, you are also advised to keep track of the time. This is because different cheaters have different schedule. Some cheat frequently. While others only cheat occasionally.
What is the implication? Well, it means that your private investigator might have to follow your spouse for an extended period of time before he can capture the proofs that you need. This can be very costly to you.
Since there are a number of pros and cons to catching a cheating spouse with the assistance of a private investigator, you are urged to examine your own personal wants and needs. Do you want proof that your spouse is cheating on you?
Do you want proper and professional documentation that can be used in divorce proceedings? If so, a private investigator is worth the look.
Tags: affairs, cheating, Dating, home and family, infidelity, Love, marriage, men, relationship, Relationships, society, women
Marriage Advice For Feeling More Love
We are all in relationships to feel love. That’s what we want. This is no great secret. The more love we feel, the more intimate and connected and close our sense of the relationship.
At first, when we get into a relationship, we feel a lot of love. In the first stage of falling in love, we do actually feel a lot of love.
But after the courting phase, once we are together on a regular basis, sometimes we feel really loved, sometimes we feel anywhere from okay to tense to distant. After a while we can end up “stumbling about” in our relationship hoping to feel really loved as it becomes more hit and miss.
Fortunately, there is a way to make each other feel real love every day. No more hit and miss. Using a tool that can be called the Love Multiplier, you can push each others love buttons often.
The Love Multiplier is deceptively simple. The first thing you need to do is to discover your personal structure for feeling loved. Yes, you have a “structure” for feeling loved by your partner. There is some thing or combination of things that he/she can do that make you feel really loved. You know what it is though you may not have thought about it in this way before.
How this works is that some things make you feel loved and some don’t. If a fly buzzes around your ear, you don’t feel love. When your mate whispers huskily into your ear you may feel strongly loved. The clue is that some things work to make you feel loved and others have no affect on you.
This is important to understand.
Feelings of love don’t just happen to us willy-nilly. Oftentimes, feelings are results, they have causes or “structures.” Of all the things your mate does, when you can identify the behaviors that make you feel loved you can start to feel it “on purpose.”
We each have a unique way that we feel love. Some of us feel it kinesthetically, through certain kinds of touch. Others visually, through our mate dressing up for us and showing us a good time. You just need to figure out what your mate does that pushes your love button, and figure out what pushed their love button. Then start pushing their love buttons and have them start pushing yours.
There is a lot more to figuring out our love buttons, but just this can help you to start bringing more love into your relationship on purpose every day.
Tags: advice, conflict, how to, intimacy, Love, marriage, relationship advice, Relationships, society
A Husband’s View of Romantic Movies – Ya Gotta Laugh
Serious romance is hard work and just so, well, serious. Does it have to be? How do you and your husband relax? My guess is you need a few laughs to enjoy each other.
Here’s a romance test for you. Would your husband rather cuddle up with you on the couch and watch a) The Notebook; a gorgeously romantic tear-jerker of a movie or b) watch dust settle on the flat screen TV.
Of course, my husband would rather watch paint dry than sit through a seriously romantic movie like The Notebook or Somersby. He’s romantic, but none of that “mushy” and “bittersweet” stuff for him. A few belly laughs mixed in with some tender lovey-dovey moments is what he’s all about.
Our date nights usually involve Ben Stiller, Bill Murray, Adam Sandler, Owen Wilson, Matt Dillon, or Jim Carrey. Those men don’t know this, but they’re a huge part of what makes our marriage such a joy. The fact that our date nights consist of a fun movie instead of a forced moment means that my husband is happy and relaxed; two very good things for romance.
If your husband is like mine, he’s feeling the same need for romance with a healthy dose of belly laughs. These are some of our favorite fun movies.
The Princess Bride (1987): At the start of the movie, Grandpa is reading the story of The Princess Bride to his grandson, who is appalled when he thinks the book is all about kissing, since that’s how the story starts. If your husband is also appalled to watch a romantic movie all about kissing, he’s in for a pleasant surprise; just like the grandson. We’re talking Pirates, sword fighting, battles, castles, an evil Prince, and a beautiful Princess, all wrapped up in a very funny story, full of grown up humor, which will have you hooked on this romantic comedy forever more.
Groundhog Day (1993): This movie is not only funny, it’s a look into human potential for love and living life through the repetition of one, dreary Groundhog Day… over and over and over… until a miserably cryptic weatherman, played by Bill Murray, can get it right. Through the process, he tries to figure out how to win the love of the woman who, well, starts out really not liking him in the least. The movie is a classic and one that you’ll want to watch over and over and over and over…
Wedding Crashers (2005): Owen Wilson and Vince Vaughn are at their hilarious best in this movie. They are two divorce mediators all week and ‘wedding crashers’ on the weekend. They don’t just sneak into weddings to meet women, they make themselves part of the party. They dance, get in the pictures, and make up stories about who they know… and everyone believes them. Eventually, you know there has to be a love entanglement or two. There are some love and life lessons to learn. You’ll enjoy this light-hearted pick.
The Wedding Singer (1998): Robbie, the wedding singer and Julia, the waitress, are both engaged to be married, but to the wrong people. Anyone who remembers the 80s will thoroughly enjoy the setting, styles, and music. And, every woman will be teary-eyed when Robbie sings ‘Grow Old With You’ at the end… and watch your husband sneak a hanky, too. Adam Sandler is at his funny and romantic best. Cuddle up for some good laughs, and kisses!
Fun With Dick and Jane (2005): Life is good for Dick and Jane, until the stock collapses at the company that Dick works for, and he’s made to be the fall guy. Losing all their money, their home, and their respectability in the community, tips the couple right over the edge. Off they go on a ridiculously funny blue-collar crime spree. But, when things take an unexpected turn, they turn their crime spree into something to heal the working people and the town. Jim Carrey is funny, crazy, and sweet, all at the same time. Lots of laughs and a warm ending.
Love Actually (2003): This is really eight movies in one. Short stories that tell about love, romantic love, family love between a father and son, siblings, and friends. This is a truly touching movie, but has enough laughs and light moments to keep your husband awake and interested… and laughing. Good laughs and many gentle moments to remember. Cuddle up, grab the tissues, and be ready to learn a thing or two about the meaning of love.
Taking romance seriously can really be hard to do, especially if your husband is like so many others. They need a laugh or two to relax and start to enjoy themselves… and you! Pick out a funny romantic movie, get cozy, and enjoy your time together.
RomanceYourHusband.com is dedicated to helping married couples stay friends and to help them remember why they married each other in the first place. Whether you’re looking for words to show love or wedding vow renewal ideas, we can help.
Tags: date night, Entertainment, family, Love, making marriage fun, marriage, movie night with spouse, movies, Relationships, romance, romance at home, romancing your spouse, romantic comedies, romantic movies
